2025 February 18 Who's really running your life?

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Hi, this is Jim Cranston from 7EveryMinute and 7EveryMinute.com, the podcast and website about reimagining your life. Thanks for joining me today! Tonight, we’re talking about a big question: Who’s in charge? If you like what you hear, please leave a like, subscribe, tell your friends, or send me a message.

So, why do our lives seem to go the way they do? How do certain things come to be? We often discuss how we can change our response to a situation, and through that, sometimes control the situation—at least to some degree. Of course, bad things happen, and sometimes there’s nothing we can do about it. But even in those really unpleasant moments, we often have some ability to lessen their impact just by shifting how we view and respond to them.

But what about all those things in life we don’t necessarily love? Things like our job, responsibilities, chores—all the things that always seem to take up so much of our time. What got me thinking about this today was listening to a presentation at work. Lately, I’ve been feeling a little disappointed with certain aspects of my job, and it really made me reflect on this topic.

It had to do with the quality of the work being assigned to me versus some of the other groups. And of course, my first reaction was, Why don’t I get the more interesting projects? After sulking for a minute, I took a step back and thought about it. I realized that I wasn’t involved in those projects for a reason.

I had made the choice not to promote myself for them. I knew they would be more time-intensive, require extra attention, and ultimately impact my ability to work on this podcast, the courses, and everything related to pursuing our passions. And suddenly, I felt a little silly—but also relieved and re-energized, both for the podcast and my day job.

Because here’s the funny part—I was jealous of something I had consciously chosen not to pursue. I was disappointed that things were going exactly the way I had wanted them to go. Sounds silly, right? But I think we all do this sometimes.

We work toward our goals, set our priorities, and put everything in order. Then, suddenly, we see some shiny new object, and we start resenting why we can’t have it or do it too. But the truth is, we can—we just already decided it wasn’t aligned with our own life vision.

In the moment, we often forget to check whether that new want is something that will really help us—or just distract us. That’s why it’s so important to regularly revisit our goals and, most importantly, our life vision. Ideally, we should do this at least once or twice a day.

Life is full of distractions. Some are just random things that cross our path, while others—like social media, advertising, and news headlines—are designed to pull our attention away. This is why we need to keep our vision present in our daily lives, not just as an occasional thought, but as something we actively focus on.

Our mind will do everything in its power to keep us moving toward our vision—but only if we consistently remind it what that vision actually is. If we constantly chase every new desire that pops up, our mind will assume that’s our new goal. But when we take the time to define what truly matters—whether it’s how we want to retire, how we want to spend our time, or the kind of relationships we want—our mind will not only guide us toward it but also help filter out distractions along the way.

So what happens when we do go off track? When we get jealous of something that, in reality, isn’t even that important to us? That’s when we need a little positive—not negative—self-talk. It’s about learning to recognize those seemingly desirable but ultimately unimportant distractions and refocus on what truly matters.

This practice helps both us and our mind reinforce what’s truly important—while also learning to ignore the things that don’t hold much value for us.

I’ve mentioned him before—Ramit Sethi. He has a saying that I absolutely love: Spend extravagantly on the things you love, and cut costs mercilessly on the things you don’t.

This concept applies not just to money but also to time and focus. Invest your time and attention in the things that will help you and move you toward your true life vision. And for the things that don’t? Just let them go. Don’t waste energy trying to fit them in or justify them. If something isn’t leading you toward your vision, it really shouldn’t be important to you.

So, back to the original question: Who’s in charge of your life and the events that seem to be important? Well, to a large degree, you have a lot of control over which things you choose to focus on. Yes, unexpected situations and emergencies will arise, but even those can become stepping stones toward your vision—if you communicate that vision clearly to your brain.

When we find ourselves craving something or feeling jealous, it’s worth stepping back and asking: Is this new want actually aligned with my vision? Chances are, it’s not—because if it was, our brain would already be leading us toward it. And if we’re questioning whether something is important, that’s often our brain’s way of saying, Why are you even paying attention to this? It’s not what we truly want to do.

And if a situation isn’t leading us toward our vision, then no matter how tempting it seems, it probably isn’t worth wanting.

So, that’s it for the evening. Remember to re-envision your true life vision at least once a day— even during those small moments when you have a few seconds. The more we remind ourselves of what our life vision really is, the easier it will be for our brain to find ways to make it a reality.

Your homework tonight is to revisit your life vision and make sure your goals are still leading you where you want to go. If everything looks good, then make it a daily practice—maybe every morning or every night—to sit, truly immerse yourself in that vision, and think about the next steps to bring it to life.

As always, thank you so much for joining me tonight. And please remember, there’s a lot of unrest in the world right now—wars, political and social conflicts, and many difficult situations. Please check out our updated webpage, UKR7.com, which links to ways you can support the people of Ukraine. And don’t forget about World Central Kitchen at WCK.org—they do incredible work, providing meals in disaster areas all over the world. We talk about them every week, and their support is always needed.

You know, those are all great causes, and a lot of people like to donate on a grand scale—which is fantastic. But there are also so many local charities and organizations that help people in your own community, whether it’s supporting special groups, individuals with specific needs, or just lending a hand where it’s needed most.

And even if you’re not in a position to donate money right now—or if that’s just not where your mindset is at—don’t forget that the smallest gestures can make a big impact. Something as simple as a smile to a passerby can change their day for the better. That kindness ripples outward and makes life just a little brighter for more people than you might realize.

When we look beyond ourselves, our whole perspective shifts. It helps us see the world differently and understand what others might be going through. If you see someone who looks down, just smile. You don’t need a long conversation—just a simple “Good morning” can be enough to remind them that someone noticed, that someone cared.

As always, thank you for stopping by. If you found something interesting or useful, please share it with others. Don’t forget to subscribe and hit that like button. If there’s something you’d like to hear more about, drop me a comment and let me know.

Have a great week, and remember—live the life you dream of, because that's the path to true contentment. Love and encouragement to all. See you next time on 7EveryMinute and 7EveryMinute.com.