2022 May 17 Positive change starts with you

Hi, this is Jim Cranston from 7EveryMinute and 7EveryMinute com, the podcast and website by, for and about Baby Boomers. Thanks for joining me tonight for a little reflection on some recent events and what we can do to spread a different viewpoint throughout the world. So, let’s get started on that. 

800-273-8255 / 988

But first, of course, the regular reminder: I’m not a medical professional. I’ll be talking about things that I personally find useful. If you find yourself feeling truly hopeless or truly depressed, please seek professional medical attention as soon as you can, or just dial 911. Also starting July 16th, 2022 (and available in some areas now) dialing (988) will connect you with immediate assistance. The general number for help is (800) 273-8255. Good to know for yourself or maybe a friend. 

This week we’ll continue our trend of shorter Lives with just a thought or two. This past weekend,  there was a senseless shooting in Buffalo, New York. That’s at the other end of the state for me, but it’s just a few hours away. I know there will be wailing about guns or racism or what was going on in that person’s mind. Those are all different things. I saw a really good article asking why everyone is so interested in this person. What matters is the actions and how somebody could be thinking along those lines, so I agree with that.

That’s one thing, but rather I really want to take a step further back and for each of us to look at our own actions and particularly how we react with those who are different from us. This isn’t like What are we doing that’s bad? The world has become extremely aggressive and we all know that the news has become this eternal font of bad stuff: telling us how different we are from each other, how scary everyone else is, and in particular, what a threat everybody is to us. Anyone that has a different idea isn’t just a different idea, they’re a threat to us.

I have a show and tell tonight. A regional newspaper had this really prescient headline, because it was a Sunday morning newspaper and so, they’re printed on Saturday nights. It wasn’t in the papers yet. This is before the news of this should even happen and it said, in all capitals - this is really worth looking at - A New Battlefield for Cultural Wars. Boy, oh boy oh boy. Think about that statement. Now, it is a pretty hateful statement. Pretty aggressive, this lead headline in this very liberal newspaper. What was this all about? What could be a new battlefield in cultural wars. Just bam. Bam. What is this all about? My gracious. 

What is this all about? School board elections. That’s what got this level of headline and verbiage and aggression and divisiveness. School board elections. Think about that statement. We’ll just talk about that headline. 

I hear this sort of aggression and prejudice every day. Not only in the media, but in everyday conversation. You hear it from the person sitting next to you in the line of the store. We hear it from people at work, and they say these things. How can you say that? Like regular things. You look at TV shows. It’s not a good TV show unless everybody hates each other. 

The women are always talking down to the men, and the men are always stupid, and the men are talking down to the women, and it’s just endless. What can we do about it? The big thing we can do about it is don’t accept it. Don’t participate in it. That kind of behavior is not the new normal. It’s a contrived normal. There’s nothing good about it. There’s nothing positive about it. There’s nothing healing the country. There’s nothing bringing us together. There’s nothing moving us forward. 

So just don’t participate in it. When you hear somebody, especially if it’s somebody close, when they say something like that, perhaps you can ask them what they really mean by that statement. Then listen and really listen to the response. The listening part is really important. When you really listen to somebody, you focus on them, and their brain realizes it. Suddenly now they have an audience, and things act differently in their brains. We’ll go over that in a second. 

Just ask them what they mean by that statement. Really listen to the response, because you’re not trying to start a fight. You’re not going to teach them something. But when they have to slowly explain something to somebody else who they know is really listening and tell them exactly what they mean, a different part of their brain becomes engaged and involved. That part of the brain will listen, just like you’re listening. 

They’ll listen to what they themselves are saying, and start to analyze it. They will recognize it for the foolishness that it really is. It won't always change someone’s mind, but hopefully it will make them think for even just a moment. That might be enough to help prevent the next hateful outburst or far worse. The only thing we can really control is ourselves. We can control our response to the world around us. Maybe my newspaper is comfortable calling the very healthy democratic process of a school board vote the new battleground for cultural wars, but we don’t have to stoop to that low level. 

Let me just put this on the floor where it belongs. Maybe the cat will use it, because that’s all it’s good for. Those sorts of thoughts bring nothing to the world. It’s easy to stand and point a finger at somebody else. It’s really hard to invite them over and really listen to them. That’s what this world needs. That’s what you and I can do to make a change You, I, we - can be the positive element of change - not just talk about tolerance and empathy,  but to be the actual example of how to work together, rather than always try to put people out, push people apart from each other. 

And if you’re in my demographic, you have the experience and wisdom to know what Ben Franklin said is really true. We can hang together or all hang separately. We really all have more in common than differences. We should never forget that. We should remind other people about that. So, that's it - just one little message for the evening. Even by our simplest of actions, we can make a huge change. That even means if you have to listen to somebody who you really find their thoughts revulsive. It’s even almost more important then, because those are the people who you really want to hopefully get them to think about what they’re saying, and realize that what they’re saying is just based on reaction and is in a reasonable statement. 

So that’s it. Very brief. Off I go. Thanks for stopping by. Stay healthy. Care for yourself. Remember to care for others, because that’s how you end up at your very best.

Then, of course, all the regular reminders. We have UKR7.com. That's our regular link to all the places we can donate and support Ukraine. Super important. If anybody’s looking for ways they can help in Ukraine, just point them to that and it forwards onto a page that has just links to all sorts of other places. UKR7.com.

7em.link/Mariupol

This is a movie that was actually made very recently, obviously in Mariupol, showing the conditions that people are living in, and the behavior of the Russians, and the things that they’re doing in the war against Ukraine. No matter how good your imagination is, this movie is very realistic. And I have a feeling it’s probably not nearly as realistic as the reality of what’s going on there. They’re talking to people whose spouses perished the day before. They’re in their apartment, and got shelled, a direct hit from the Russians firing from the sea, 20, 30 miles away. I mean, it just goes on and on and on and on. 

I have a friend who said this is all rigged, this is all staged. It’s pretty amazing to hear him say that. If anybody says anything like that, or they’re saying that Ukraine’s are winning, send them to that link. Go to the movie. It’s on YouTube. You can search it on YouTube directly. All that link does is take you to YouTube. Take a look at it. Check it out. That’s what war is really like, and that’s what we don’t want, and that’s why we have to change the attitude in the United States. That this whole divisiveness and being at each other’s throats is not the way to achieve peace. 

So as always, be true to yourself. Live the life that you’re aligned with, and if you’re true to your goals that’s the best way to to live a life that you’re really satisfied with. Thank you for stopping by. If you found something interesting, please pass it along. If you did not, please drop me a note about what you’d like to hear. Have a great week. Thanks for visiting, and remember to live the life that you dream of, because that’s the path to true contentment. Love and encouragement to everyone, and see you next week on 7EveryMinute and 7EveryMinute.com.